Գիշեր | gisher is a video for a performance space. At the center of Գիշեր | gisher are images, that multiply and discompose the action of looking, asking the viewer to Orient. There are words, written and told and offered and translated and read out loud.
Գիշեր | gisher is the action of feeding, of keeping lit, of burning.
Impostor Syndrome is ancestral heritage is intergenerational trauma.
Yesterday I had so much fire that I had to lie on the grass facing down with my palms on the ground. I wanted to stop feeling my body burning so much.
Have i become my coping mechanisms?
I self sabotage by having a lot of opinions on the love I receive. But I can never just receive love, who the fuck does that?
I am so tired.
I am so tired.
(I don’t know who I am without my tiredness.)
I wish I could write before my own criticism before this internalized hegemonic sense of worth.
Before the feeling that I haven’t thought of everything, haven’t considered all the possible potentially catastrophic things and wordings that could destroy everything.
Me.
Because it’s so confusing. Yes.
I was born on a monday.
